Sherlock Tumblr Porn

News flash: You can be in love and still think your husband’s a dick at times.

Not that Sherlock would ever, ever use that word to describe John because, frankly, just no.

That’s all right, he’s got plenty of other sobriquets for his husband. Both versions: Good John and Bad John.

Good John makes Sherlock eat—and cooks the food. He swears mightily when the smoke alarm goes off—and enters the fray with a fire extinguisher. Good John crooks his finger as they queue, then whispers in Sherlock’s ear—the things he says often cause raging erections. In public.

That John is Sherlock’s tiny tyrant. His diminutive darling. His sweetheart, his husband, his love.

Then there’s Bad John.

Bad John threatens dismemberment when Sherlock breaks their crockery—and brandishes a butter knife to make his point. Bad John complains when Sherlock licks his plate at a restaurant—and throttles his shins under the table. Bad John says, “Ha ha ha, think again mister,” when Sherlock tries to get a leg over after crockery’s been broken, a plate licked, holes shot in walls, or a consulting detective’s been rude to friends.

That John is…is…well that John’s called “I’m not talking to you right now, you know,” and “That wasn’t my fault technically, if you just think about it,” and also “I’m sorry. No, really I am.” Because, damn it, Bad John? Bad John’s usually right.

News flash: You can be in love with your husband and still be a dick at times. But apparently that compact little creature? That pint-sized potentate? Well it seems he’ll love you anyway.

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Like a certain diminutive despot we all love, Livia Carica has bad days. This was my tiny effort to brighten hers. To my delight, Livia responded in kind. It is awesome.